The Psychic Singer
The Journey of an Empathic Musician
When I was a little girl I felt things that I could not understand. I searched my small world for the answers to the many questions I had but there were no answers! At least not in my physical universe.
What I found was this guiding voice within. It was a voice that helped to make sense of all the crazy feelings inside.
I began to sing my feelings and write songs about them. Little did I know way back then that what I was feeling wasn't necessarily mine. I was greatly empathic and had the ability to sense and feel what others were feeling around me. They became the inspiration for my songs.
I had a brush with death when I was a teenager. I was so overwhelmed with what was happening to me on an emotional level that I became anorexic. It was my way of "checking out!" There was a part of me that really wanted to die, to leave this earth and not have to feel all this craziness around me. Yet there was another part of me that knew I was here for a reason. That was the part that kept me alive.
There was a time when I was around 17 years old that I was pitching hay to the cattle on the dairy farm I grew up on and my weak 89 pound body collapsed right into the hay. I lay there half awake and half asleep and I heard this really beautiful, loving voice. She told me that I did have a purpose. I would grow up to have the voice of angels and that I would heal many.
At the time I didn't understand this. I was scared to death of singing in public. I didn't want anyone to hear my voice. I didn't think I was very good. In high school there were much better singers. They were the ones who loved the stage and loved to be in the center of attention. I, on the other hand, ran from attention. It made me uncomfortable.
Over the years, into adulthood, I felt more and more compelled to sing. The music continued to pour out of me and I was writing more songs than most songwriters ever dream about. Whenever the feelings became too overwhelming I would put them into a song.
My songs were intuitive readings on the world around me. I wrote about how I perceived people and how I saw the world. At first I had a lot of darkness around me. I seemed to attract a lot of intense energy that robbed me of my lifeforce.
As time went on I learned about my strong empathic nature. I realized I was clarsentient which is the psychic gift of feeling. Before I understood this gift I believed all the feelings I was having were mine and my life felt really chaotic. I learned how to separate myself from these feelings and even learned on the most part who they belonged to.
My music took on a very strong healing property. It likely emerged from my own desire to heal those around me. I accessed their deep emotions and put that energy into songs. When people listened to the songs they were able to access their own repressed emotion.
In performances there are always lots of tears, but not necessarily tears of sadness. It is more what happens when a damn has been broken and the flow rushes through. Everything they have been bottling up inside finally breaks through.
Now I use both of my gifts to help others. I use both my singing voice and the great tones that come through me and also the sense of feeling and knowing to offer insight and guidance to others in the form of my intuitive guidance counseling. This is where the psychic reader emerged. She always was there, but never fully step out of the shadows and onto the stage of life where her gifts could be shared.
Now I look back at that Angel I heard when I was a teenager and realized that she knew me. It was a dark time in my life and I had no idea my life had any meaning or value. She had to remind me of a deeper purpose so I would chose life.
I realized that my pain back then ended up being a gift now and can help others in healing their pain. That is purpose unfolding. All we ever need to do is allow for our true selves to come through. That is our real purpose. The more we allow for our authentic selves to step out onto the stage of life, the more we let our lights shine and the more we are serving our fellow man and woman.
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